Remembering a Loved One: Tips for Writing a Eulogy
Arranging a funeral is an understandably stressful process, which is, of course, made even more difficult because of having to deal with so many practical things at the same time experiencing grief for a lost loved one. Luckily, it's not something people usually need to do alone, as there's help available from professional funeral homes, even if there aren't any friends or family members that can help.
However, one of the more difficult parts of funeral arrangements is often writing an eulogy. It needs a deep personal knowledge of the deceased, and while grieving, it can be extremely difficult to get your thoughts together enough to write a good eulogy. Follow these steps and the process will be much easier.
Decide on the type of eulogy
First of all, you need to think about exactly what you'd like to say. A eulogy can contain a full biographical account of a person's life, but it doesn't have to. You might just want to talk about what sort of person they were, perhaps with some anecdotes and the mention of a few of their achievements.
While eulogies are often addressed to the people gathered, you could choose instead to talk to the person you've lost. This can be a good way to deal with your grief, and also makes a powerful speech for people to hear. There are no real rules, so just do what you think is best.
Make notes
Start by jotting down anything you'd like to say. If you want to talk about the person's early life, you may need to talk to other family members and keep notes of what you discover. Draw a rough plan so you know how you're going to structure the eulogy, then write it out in rough form.
Should you use humour?
Your immediate instinct may be that humour has no place in a eulogy, but that's not necessarily the case. Some gentle humour can lift the mood a little bit and help people to remember that they're celebrating a life. Ultimately, it's your decision; just base it on what you think is appropriate for the people who will be gathered.
Consider the extras
In addition to using your own words to speak about the person, you may also choose to read a poem or some other piece of writing to add a little something extra. This is especially nice if there was something loved by the deceased, or if you find something that really speaks to you.