How to help a relative who is grieving the loss of a loved one

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Planning Your Own Funeral

Hello, my name is David and this is my funeral planning blog. Funerals can be morbid affairs and your own funeral is probably something you don't want to think about. However, last year, my grandmother passed away. As my family dealt with her affairs, we discovered that she hadn't made any plans for her funeral. This made it difficult to know what she would have wanted and some of my family had an argument about the best way to proceed. I worked closely with the funeral home and discovered a lot about how best to plan a funeral and the importance of planning your own. My grandma was laid to rest in a beautiful ceremony. I hope you find this blog useful.


How to help a relative who is grieving the loss of a loved one

3 June 2017
 Categories: , Blog

If one of your relatives has lost someone dear to them (such as a partner), here are two ways that you can help them during this difficult time:

Offer to help arrange the funeral

When people suffer bereavements, they often struggle to cope with the simplest of tasks; the intensity of their grief not only makes it difficult for them to focus but also makes them feel both physically and mentally exhausted. As a result, they may find it very challenging to deal with the ins and outs of arranging their loved one's funeral. Things like taking care of the necessary paperwork and make decisions about which style of casket or coffin to use can feel very overwhelming for those who are facing the loss of someone they cared deeply about.

Given this, if your relative has been tasked with the funeral arrangements and seems to be struggling, it might be worth offering to assist them with the practical things that need to be dealt with in order to perform the funeral. If they agree, you should then get in touch with one of the funeral directors in the local area.

With the permission of your relative, you can then work with the funeral director to decide which flowers and music to use for the service, to write up the obituary and to arrange catering for after the service. Funeral directors are extremely experienced in these matters and as such, will be able to guide you through the process.

Offer support during the service

The loss of a loved one, particularly if they were an immediate family member, can make a person feel very lonely and isolated. Given this, it is important to provide as much emotional support as possible throughout the funeral process.

At an appropriate time during the service at the funeral home, say a few kind words to your relative. You can tell them that you are thinking of them and that you understand how difficult this time must be for them. Acknowledging how hard this loss must be may ease their feelings of loneliness.

On a more practical note, try to do what you can to help out at the service, so that your relative doesn't have to worry about looking after those around them. Offer tissues to those who are crying, guide people to their seats, and make sure to introduce guests to one another.

Additionally, if you are bringing your own young (and potentially noisy) children with you, it may also be wise to bring along provisions (such as a cuddly toy) to keep them calm and occupied, so that their presence does not disrupt the service.